ARTEMIS FOWL AND THE PHILOSOPHERS STONE
by bebe-malvado
Summary: what happens when you combine and 11 year old criminal mastermind and very valuable stone hiddena at a wizard school, you get the greatest theft of the century................. HP and AF crossover only Ronione pairings and Harymione, also Artemis? pairing
1. PROLOUGE

**ARTEMIS AND THE PHILOSOPHERS STONE**

Prologue-

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Hmmmmm……. Artermis fowl criminal mastermind said to himself at his latest discovery, " Butler report to the study" he spoke into the intercom.

A few minutes later heavy foot steps could be heard outside the heavy, reinforced door, the door swung open and in came the enormous form of butler " yes master Fowl?" he inquired . " butler I have recently received a disturbing letter" Artemis said and handed over to butler an open letter bearing some sort of seal which had four different animals on it. Butler opened the letter not knowing what to expect and read it out loud………………………

**Artemis fowl **

**Level 2**

**Fowl manner Ireland**

**Mister fowl we are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted into Hogwarts school of witch craft and wizardry and we would like to advise you that this year we wish you to attend Hogwarts, We have heard of your exploits mister Fowl and we trust that you will not take advantage of the situation. If you are attending Hogwarts this year then we wish to advise you that you may not conduct any illegal activities from the school also I a reply to this letter should be sent confirming your enrollment no later than the 31st of June, school commences on the 1****st**** of September and you will be boarding the Hogwarts express at precisely 10:00am at platform 9 and ¾.**

**Yours sincerely Minerva mg,onagoll **

**p.s- a list of school supplies has been posted on the back of this sheet with the directions on how to get to Diagon alley. (Also rubius Hagrid will come to collect you as you are new to the wizarding world**

Butler looked very surprised after reading this "so butler, what do you think is it just some hoax or is it genuine?" Artemis questioned him " I think that it is no hoax master Artemis you should probably attend it would give you a valuable insight to magic" Butler replied nervously under Artemis's scrutinizing gaze. " Very well then butler in will attend this so called "magic school" and maybe as you say, it will provide me with an insight on magic, Understanding magic is one thing but actually performing magic is quite another imagine how easy it will be to steal if you can just disable security with magic" Artemis said evilly grinning his most devious vampire grin……………………..

TO BE CONTINUED

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so what did you think of that ?? Hopefully this story will be better since it is my second one. I'll probably have chapter up in the holidays some time. Also reviewing would be appreciated and if you're wondering about the story Harry and everyone are only 11 and so is Artemis the story is set before he captures holly so she will not be in the story nor and other LEP characters.


	2. KNIGHT BUS

**THE KNIGHT BUS**

Artemis was asleep in his bed when he heard the security alarms sounded! The sirens blared and butler came rushing into his room "wha what is it?!!" Artemis said alarmed by the sirens. "It appears we have an intruder on the grounds and they also have a slight aura of magic about them "butler replied.

Suddenly there was aloud knocking at the door and with one final knock the door burst down! Artemis ran down stairs with butler close behind him, and in the doorway they could see the enormous figure of a man even bigger than butler! "Hello there may I come in" the large figure said cheerfully. Artemis just started at him for one at a loss for words; butler had placed himself between the man and Artemis. "And just who are you" Artemis said coldly finally regaining his normal manner.

" My name is Rubeous Hagrid professor McGonagall probably told you about me coming to pick you up in the letter" he replied still in that cheerful manner which Artemis detested. "Ah yes I remember now so you will be taking me to purchase my school supplies then "artemis inquired. "Erm yes I am just go get your things and we can be of "Hagrid said a little bit intimidated by the boys direct manner (using the term boy very loosely here as to Hagrid this did not seem like an ordinary child).

" Right then just give me a moment to fetch my trunk and change out of my nightclothes as I daresay it would be some what inappropriate attending school in this state" Artemis said and then headed up stairs. Butler while artemis was getting ready to leave looked closely at this large man supposedly called Hagrid, Hagrid was obviously nervous under the intimidating glare of butler and was relieved when Artemis came down stairs wearing a designer blue polo shirt, designer black pants and shoes he had also combed his jet black hair.

"Well shall we go then" said Artemis "yes….of course didn't you want to say goodbye to your parents?" asked Hagrid. Artemis glared at him coldly "my parents are not presently here" he said in that same emotionless manner. "Erm okay then let's get going then" said Hagrid trying to regain his cheerful manner. Artemis turned to butler and whispered " I will be in contact with you shortly keep me up to date with all our present dealings" artemis said to his bodyguard " Artemis I heard that school's magic interferes with technology! So if it does then how will I contact you" asked butler "not to worry I have adapted all my technologies to run on magic" Artemis said calmly. " ok then Artemis you better be going now if there are any problems at this school give me a call and I'll be there as soon as I can" Butler said who was a bit nervous about letting Artemis go by himself. "Thanks butler" said Artemis with a genuine smile.

"Okay are you ready to go then" asked Hagrid "yes lets go" replied Artemis. And then Hagrid stuck out his umbrella and suddenly a double story bus came flying down from the sky! Artemis stared at the bus (this is gonna be one heck of a year"Artemis thought to himself. The doors to the knight bus opened and Hagrid picked up Artemis's bags and hauled them into the bus, artemis followed after him and sat on one of the beds that the bus had in it, Artemis looked around seeing a few men and women who where obviously witches and wizards fast asleep in their beds. Hagrid then lumbered over to where Artemis sat and plonked himself down on the bed next to him. "Hold on to something" Hagrid said as the doors of the knight bus closed "what why?" Artemis said but suddenly the knight bus took of into the sky "WHOAAAA" yelled Artemis as he was thrown of the bed and onto the floor! Hagrid laughed "I did tell you to hold on", Artemis gave Hagrid a death glare and because seeing that glare was pretty scary even for a half giant he shut up. Artemis eventually fell asleep on one of the beds and before he knew it the bus was pulling up at the leaky cauldron.


	3. DIAGON ALLEY

**DIAGON ALLEY- ARTEMIS FOWL AND THE PHILOSPHERS STONE**

As Artemis entered the leaky cauldron he decided it was none to clean and was rather tacky, these two things definitely not endear this place to Artemis and when Hagrid suggested that he stay the night here he refused and insisted on a more hospitable place to sleep, Hagrid didn't listen though and he got Artemis's things and put them in a room.

Soon after they had some breakfast (as they had got there at about 4 in the morning) they went out through the back door and into an alley with a dead end. "Soooooo is this diagon alley? Artemis asked "just you watch" Hagrid replied with a bit of a smile on his face. He then turned to the wall and tapped the bricks in special order, then a door way formed out of the bricks and much to Artemis's surprise formed a way into diagon alley!

Artemis and Hagrid stepped through the doorway and into the wizarding world, all around Artemis there were carts of various wizarding items, wizards and witched in their robes, weird shops and even weirder people. Hagrid led Artemis though the crowds of people and came to the first store it was called Olivanders Wands, "you go on in i'll wait out here" said Hagrid. Artemis was a little nervous about that but he didn't show it so he went in to Olivanders.

Looking around the store he couldn't see anyone, and then to his surprise a short man with glasses and glassy eyes came out of nowhere! " ahh you must be Artemis Fowl i knew i would be seeing you soon" Olivander said knowingly " yes i am, and i am here to purchase a wand" Artemis said superiorly. Olivander just smiled at him " right then mister fowl just step this way and we,ll get you measurments, and which arm by the way is your wand arm?" he asked " that would be my left" Artemis replied assuming that your wand arm was the same as your wrighting arm. Olivander dissapeared behind a few shelves and came back with an armload of wands.

"Okay then try this one" said olivander and handed him a wand " dragon heart string and maple well go on give it a wave" he said impatiently. Artemis did as he was told and waved his wand causing a vase to break! " NO NO definetly not" said olivander and snatched the wand away from Artemis.

They went throught the process of this for half an hour and Artemis had tried every wand in the store! Olivander was very frustrated now and since none seemed right for Artemis so he just gave him a stick and told him that it was a wand, Olivander of course didn't make Artemis pay for the stick and gave it to him for free under the guise of the 100th customer of the week gift.

Artemis knew that the so called "wand" wasn't really a wand but he didn't make a fuss out of it and so Hagrid and Artemis left a very releived shop keeper and went of to buy the rest of Artemie's school supplies, And after Hagrid had managed to drag Artemis out of flourish and blots for the 5th tme that day they went to the Magical Creature Imporeum to get Artemis an owl.

Artemis again went into the shop alone and immediatly started looking at all the birds, one hawk caught his eye and he walked over to its cage and through the bars stroked its soft black feathers. One of the shopkeepers walked up to him and said " you know i think he's taken a likin to ya cause he never lets anyone pet him" " he's a really nice bird what is he called?" Artemis asked the shop assistant " he doesn't have a name yet sooo are you inetested in buyin him?" he asked Artemis. "yeah okay why not" said artemis

And five minutes later artemis exited the shop with his black hawk which he had named vampire perched on his shoulder. Hagrid looked at the bird with some surprise" i thought you would be gettin and owl" he asked curiously "nah owls are so dirty and besides vampire is probably 100x smater than one of those birds" said Artemis. Hagrid raised his eyebrow at the name" vampire?" he questioned " you like the name i think its very suiting" Artemis replied shooting him his infamous vampire grin.

It was late by the time they came back to the leaky cauldren and Artmeis found that he was really tired and did not even complain about the food or lodgeings much to Hagrids releif. And soon Artemis was asleep ready for the next day in this new world of knowlegde and power...

**so what do you think of that so far? please reveiw it helps me get better at my stories...**

**also the next chapter should be up by the holidays or maybe not because i,m busy on da weekend**


	4. HARRY POTTER

**ARTEMIS FOWL AND THE PHILOSOPHERS STONE- **_**HARRY POTTER**_

Artemis woke up that morning to the loud sound of a passing train; he then remembered that today was the day he would be leaving for Hogwarts! He quickly got up then got dressed in his designer clothing. Vampire suddenly squawked and there was a knock on the door and he heard the booming voice of Hagrid "Artemis you better hurry up there is someone I want you to meet down here". Artemis of course ignored this and took as long as he possibly could to march himself downstairs to meet who ever it was.

**Artemis p.o.v**

I went down stairs to see this someone that Hagrid was telling me about it turned out to be a rather ordinary looking boy with a rather unordinary scar on his forehead; he had what looked like second hand clothes on and a very cheap looking, scruffy haircut. Clearly this boy wasn't what you would call well off and that immediately got us of on the wrong foot. I looked at him haughtily and said "who are you", I wasn't particularly interested in anything he had to say but he replied anyway. "I'm Harry Potter, Hagrids taking me to the train station with you". "Lucky me" I said sarcastically, "so when are we leaving?" I asked hagrid. Hagrid laughed then said cheerfully "so eager to get to school aye that's somethin you don see in kids these days" " I assure you I'm not one of those kids you see these days" I replied with every bit of superiority I could muster.

**Still Artemis p.o.v**

About half an hour later we all got in a cab and headed down to the train station. The taxi that we caught though was a little strange because even though me and Harry had heaps of luggage they somehow managed to fit it all in. Soon we got to kings cross station and Hagrid gave me and Harry our tickets "your just gonna leave us here" Harry asked him incredulously, "listen boys it's really simple all you have to do is go to platform nine and three quarters, I would normally have seen you of there but I got to take this to Dumbledore" he said and proudly held up a small paper wrapped package. "Oops told you too much, forget I ever mentioned it" he said hurriedly and rushed away. That was definetly curious i thought to my self this bears investigation.

**No ones p.o.v**

The two boys both stood where Hagrid had left them, Artemis looked at his ticket to make sure Hagrid had said the right platform "that lunatic gave us the wrong platform there is no such thing as platform nine and three quarters!" Artemis said angrily. "HEY HAGRID IS NOT A LUNATIC!" Harry almost screamed at him. "Geeze will you shut up everyone is looking at us" Artemis said calmly. And he was right everyone was looking at them including a group of redheads "You must be going to Hogwarts as well! We heard you mention Hagrid" said the one who appeared to be the mother. "Um yeah we are could you help us find platform nine and three quarters?" Harry asked politely. " Sure dear'ie just run at the wall between nine and ten" she said sweetly "oh and by the way this is my son Ron he is a first year as well, you wouldn't mind if he tagged along with you?" she asked them. "No of course not" Harry replied. Artemis on the other hand did mind but decided not to voice his opinion, Harry then offered his hand to the red head called Ron and shook his hand "My names Ron weasly" the boy said "And mines Harry Potter". The boy started in aw at Harry "something the matter Harry asked "your Harry Potter" he asked still in that awed voice. Artemis looked very surprised at the reaction Harry had gotten from the boy and figured that there was more to this guy that met the eye and he decided to make sure he found out what that was.

" Who's he" Ron asked Harry pointing at Artemis, but before Harry could answer that Artemis decided to tell him " It's rude to point" he said coldly" and I'm Artemis Fowl the second ". Ron obviously taken aback by the boys cold manner retreated a little bit behind Harry.

"Okay then boys you don't want to be late just go ahead and run through the wall" Ron's mother said to them. "Alright Fred gorge you first" she said to two identical redheads "right" they said in unison and ran straight through the wall! Harry gasped and Artemis blinked his eyes in amazement as if trying to clear away an illusion as the two boys seemingly disappeared through the wall. "Arthur you me and Percy next" she said to an balding man and yet another tall redhead boy" And they too ran though the wall.

It was now just Ron, Harry and Artemis standing there now, "Right then lets go" said Ron who was obviously not that nervous from doing this before. So the three of them following his lead made a run at the wall…………………


	5. HOGWARTS EXPRESS

THE HOGWARTS EXPRESS

The three boys ran through the seemingly solid wall and came out the other side onto, platform nine and three quarters!

Both Harry and Artemis looked around in amazement at 1) they had not run head first into the wall 2) that there was a magical train platform on the other side and 3) that they were now headed on perhaps what could be described as the greatest adventure ever.

The Hogwarts train blew its whistle signaling the students to hurry up or it would leave without them. Ron had walked over to his mother and the rest of his family and said goodbye, there were lot's of tears and hugs involved in that( mostly from his mother) and once that was all out of the way they all got aboard the train and started on the business of trying to find an empty compartment.

As they went along the train they saw many students, some who were already in their house robes. They all talked merrily about their holidays and such as the three continued to look for a place to sit.

At the almost end of the train they found an almost empty carriage, its only occupant was a girl with bushy brown hair and slightly overgrown front teeth, she was reading a book that from the front cover read Hogwarts a history. "I thought I was the only one who read ahead" thought Artemis, "hey do you mind if we sit here?" Harry asked the girl "no go right a head" she smiled at them showing more of her front teeth.

The three sat down, Ron sitting with Harry and talking about their summers and Artemis in the corner farthest from them and closest to the window and started working on his laptop which now ran of magic!

Hermione looked at him curiously when she saw his lap top and said in a very know it all way "You now that won't work in Hogwarts because I read in Hogwarts a…." she was interrupted in mid sentence "Hogwarts a history… I know that's why I charmed it to run of magic" he explained to her slowly in a way that you might talk to a toddler.

She dropped the subject and went back to her book; meanwhile Harry and Ron sat there discussing things ranging from the weather to their favorite chocolate. And seemingly at the mention of the word chocolate a candy trolley pushed by an ageing woman came trundling by "anything from the trolley dears" the old woman asked sweetly through the compartment door.

Harry and Ron immediately got up and bought as much as they could which was very little in Ron's case, so they ended up sharing. Hermione to bought various sweets and chocolates, "and what about you" she asked Artemis still in that sickenly sweet voice that should have been wrapped up and put in a candy store.

" I don't think so" Artemis said back to her coldly and gave her a look that could have sent a vicious mountain troll running for cover.

The old lady with the trolley immediately left after that looking a bit scared and hurt.

"Just who do you think you are talking to that nice lady like that!?" Hermione said indignantly to Artemis after the exchange with the trolley woman.

"I think" he replied " that I am Artemis Fowl the Second". Hermione looked strange for a minute then slightly fearful. "YOU!!" she almost gasped" "you're that criminal I heard about on TV!! Your family one of the biggest criminal groups in the world!" she replied shakily.

Harry and Ron looked at him in surprise at that information, Artemis then grinned his vampire grin at the three "the very same" he said standing up at the same time and bowing mockingly to them.

"What are you doing here then if you're a criminal" Ron blurted out. Artemis sighed at that terminology "criminal is such an ugly term, I much prefer non-returnaryloaner" he said in that mocking tone.

"And also I haven't actually been caught in the act so I'm innocent until proven guilty" he finished. "No I mean what are you doing at Hogwarts then?" Ron asked.

"The same reason as you" Artemis replied coolly "Soooo you're not here to steal something" Harry asked him with a raised eyebrow.

"Would I ever do that" Artemis trying to pull an innocent look but not succeeding. The three looked at him for a moment and Harry and Ron burst out laughing at his so called innocent act, Hermione though didn't find it amusing at all " I don't find crime amusing" she said in a cold and stiff tone.

"You know we don't even know your name and you're already telling us of" said Ron a little bit annoyed at her. "Fine then I'll tell you my names Hermione Granger" she told them. " ohhhhhh that's scarier than my name!" Artemis said pretending to be fearful.

The other two laughed again at hearing that and Hermione scowled at them and stuck her face back in her book, "maybe this guy isn't so bad" Harry thought.

Then suddenly their compartment door slid open again this time to reveal a boy who was almost as pale as Artemis, the boy had sleeked back blonde hair and blue grey eyes , Those eyes held in them arrogance and cruelty.

He was flanked by two human mountains that looked like his bodyguards the way they were standing there menacingly ready to pummel anyone in their way, but unfortunately their muscles must have been the only thing they had because their faces shone with stupidity so brightly that you would need sunglasses.

Everyone in the compartment looked up quickly when they saw them, Artemis unlike the others was not scared of the humanized gorillas "And just who are you" Artemis asked them arrogantly. The blonde one looked a bit taken aback at that but quickly recovered, "My name is Draco Malfoy" he said puffing himself up in pride "is that supposed to impress me" Artemis asked him.

Draco's face flickered in annoyance "For your information the Malfoys are an entirely pure blood family and a highly respected one as well" he said heatedly. "Since we are making all these introductions why don't I introduce myself" Artemis said in a mocking voice. "I am Artemis Fowl the Second".

Then for the second time that day someone had reacted in fear from his name. Malfoy's puffed up importance seemed to deflate at that and he looked at him with scared eyes.

"YOU kidnapped a fairy and held it for ransom!!" he said in a fearful voice as he backed further and further away from Artemis.

"Yes I did infact it was very profitable I should definitely do it again sometime" Artemis said grinning his vampire grin at Malfoy. At the sight of that oh so dreaded smile Malfoy turned on his heal and almost ran out the door in terror with his cronies close behind him!

"Whoa what did you do to him" Ron asked him amazed at the sight of Artemis reducing Draco to a near wreck. "You see I while ago his family did something to anger my family so we sent an arsonist in and torched his house we also killed his dog and his grandparents" Artemis said not showing any sign of guilt at that.

They all started at him not knowing what to say, and they spent the rest of the journey like that until they had to get into their school robes.

Soon after that they arrived at Hogwarts and from there things got very, very interesting……………….


End file.
